How letting go helped me feel better in my changing body…
by Jen Friedlin
Society tells us that things have to be perfect to be good. This causes us to think that whenever things go awry, then things are bad. We strive tirelessly for perfection and a status quo without woes. We look at our aging skin, sagging muscles, and aching bodies and rather than accept the changes and meet ourselves where we are at, many of us feel badly about ourselves.
The reality is that everything is actually designed to fall apart, not hold together.
I find this truth oddly reassuring. It helps me to accept how things are. This enables me to stop fighting the tide of change, to let go of my wish that things remained as they were or how I think they should be. As I accept things as they are, I find renewed strength.
For example, when menopause hit, I tanked. My sleep went out the door, sapping my energy, which caused me to stop running. My metabolism changed and I put on a lot of weight even though I was eating less than in my days of fearless dieting. My skin started to change and my hair started to thin, too. I could no longer deny that I was firmly in middle age.
I considered every remedy and threw a few wasted dollars at some. I so badly wanted to reclaim my former level of energy, my ability to sleep, my youth. When I realized I could not do that, I wanted to give up. I felt like if I could not be the way I was, could not exercise at the level I used to, I should give up.
And then I let go.
I started to accept the changes and work with them instead of against them. I focused on sleep and trying to get through the night. I started to meditate, which helped me to focus on the good of each day and to feel my strength to tackle whatever may come. I read about diet and nutrition to make sure I was getting what my body needed.
As my sleep and diet improved, my energy returned, too. Things started to settle for me physically. I shed a few pounds, although my once ideal weight is no longer attainable. I started shifting my workouts from hard-driving running and heavy lifting to more gentle walk/runs and resistance training.
Now, a few years out of that initial menopausal low, I might not be able to clock as many miles per week as I once did and those super hard gym workouts no longer appeal, but I enjoy working out while not feeling like I have to kill myself to get fit. Today, I like to mix things up, making sure I do a fair bit of cardio, resistance work, and stretching. Some days I enjoy a good sweat and some soreness, but I also let myself go easy when I need to, especially after a night when sleep has completely eluded me.
The thing I want to say is, don’t give up on your body just because it is not what it once was. We change. That’s the nature of things. But we can still be great.
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Join Jen Friedlin for MoveStrengthenStretch classes in Prospect Park every Tuesday and Friday. These classes were designed with women in perimenopause and beyond in mind, but are open to anyone. They combine low impact cardio, full body strength, balance, and flexibility/mobility, and focus on feeling good in the body you have now. Register for any class and use the code FIRSTFREE at checkout.